Hold that punch!

August 15, 2005
by Janet Donovan

Celebrities and politicians "spring from the same
DNA". Jack Valenti


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"I don't understand what gay people want from
me." "Are you looking for a revolution?"

"The heat in the gay press is that I didn't sock him,"
said Elizabeth Birch responding to the above
out of touch remarks by political pundit Pat Buchanan
during an interview on Birch & Company that launched
August 12th on the here! Gay Network.

In contrast to the controversial, uber conservative
Chicago Sun Times columnist and TV political commentator
Bob Novak who lost it on CNN last week (much to the glee of his detractors)
while thrashing it out with fast-talking, Democratic squawk box
with attitude James Carville, Birch remained in control of the sparring
interview with the arch (make that a double) conservative.

"In person he is like a grandfather figure, but a scary
one," continued Birch. She chose Buchanan in order
not to fall into a pattern of predictable guests
emphasizing her ongoing desire to understand what
drives each person and perspective. "He showed
up", added civil rights leader and Congressman Joe
Lewis, "That was a gracious act".

Gracious act? The only one gracious here was the
Congressman as Buchanan went on a biblical
reference tour of the sinful ways of a gay life.

At the preview launch hosted by The
Motion Picture Association of America viewers got an
intimate take on feisty TV talk show host Rosie
O'Donnell, the outspoken gay activist who was
the show's inaugural guest. Her very candid interview
not only displayed the star's determination for equal
rights but also unveiled her vulnerabilities and the
heartache she has endured under an unjust system.

The mother of three was particularly vocal about
adoption rights. "The baby Bushes have
done a lot of damage", said O'Donnell in reference to Florida laws
which prohibits adoption by gay couples. "Explain
Schiavo, when children of gays don't have basic rights."

Regarding her highly public law suit with the
magazine of her namesake which began to tank when
she 'came out' she said: "The lawsuit never would
have happened if I weren't a lesbian."

Closing arguments: "If being gay is such a horrible
sin it would have made the top ten," said Birch.

Well, gotta go now.....want to catch up on the
anti-gay priest caught up in a sex scandal with his
female worker.

"As rector of St. Patrick's Cathedral Monsignor Eugene Clark
blamed gays for "destroying the church", now he's been named as
"the other man" in a nasty divorce involving a woman who worked
for the diocese," according to New York's 365Gay.com
bureau chief Doug Windsor.

Clark's duties as a monsignor in the New York
Archdiocese included regular appearances on the
Catholic cable television network EWTN, on a
show called "Relationships." He also worked as an
editor of "When Conscience and Politics Meet: A Catholic
View."

In 1999 Clark told a Catholic radio audience that
gays are "the enemy of Christian marriage and
Christian falling in love and all the tenderness
that goes with that." In 2002 Clark blamed
gays for the sex abuse scandal in the Roman Catholic Church.
In a homily delivered from the pulpit at the cathedral Clark
called homosexuality a "disorder," and said gay men
should not be allowed to become priests. In a
radio broadcast he said Hollywood was
controlled by gays and their supporters advancing a
"homosexual agenda". All this from Monsignor Eugene
Clark, now caught up in his holy sex scandal
according to Windsor.

Now THAT will make the top ten. So that's
all folks!

Guests included Tammy Haddad, Executive
Producer of Hardball with Chris Matthews
and her husband Ted Greenberg as well as
Birch's longtime partner Hilary Rosen (second
from the right in the photo).

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Wait, this just in!

"Our great country is in a terrible downward spiral.
We're outsourcing jobs, bankrupting social security,
and losing lives at war. We need to focus on what's
important-- paying attention to our children, our
citizens, our future. We need to think about
improving our failing educational system, making
better use of our resources, and helping to promote
a stable, safe, and tolerant global society. It's time
to be smart about our politics. It's time to get
America back on track."

The Official
Homepage of the Walken 2008 Campaign (http://rs6.net/tn.jsp?t=sscs4nbab.0.0.6la6f9n6.0&p=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.walken2008.com)


Yup, that's all!

The Bobbsey Twins

August 4th 2005
Hollywood on The Potomac
by Janet Donovan

Celebrities and politicians "spring from the same
DNA". Jack Valenti

Senators Hillary Rodham Clinton and John
McCain: Color them fraternal, although it's
harder to tell them apart these days.

McCain's outspoken, shoot-from-the hip style
enrages many right leaning conservatives, while
Clinton's electric slide to the middle angers left leaning
Democrats.

They'd make a formidable ticket in 2008
if they weren't after the same spot. Taken
separately, here are the odds for each according to
a recent Gallop poll: In WH '08 general match-ups,
Sen. John McCain (R-AZ) defeats Sen. Hillary Clinton
(D-NY) 50%-45%. (The Hotline) However, if
this poll is as accurate as those of the last two years
color it dubious.

The McCain/Clinton love fest took their road show to
D.C.'s Uptown Theater for the Premiere of Miramax's
The Great Raid based on the true story about
WWII American POW's. While the twosome was
fulfilling their senatorial obligations with a late night
vote, the audience fidgeted for an hour. Good thing that
arm candy Mark Conseulo and Benjamin Bratt
kept the felines happy while spunky talk show host
Kelly Ripa of Regis & Kelly fame engaged
the guys. Not a bad trade off!

With the credits still rolling, some 300 guests bolted
to the after party hosted by Capitol File at
the old Shoreham Hotel famous for Mark
Russell's "Musical Mischief"

Sema Olson, who may have otherwise gone
unnoticed in the celebrity laden crowd, was
there with her young son who had recently returned from
Iraq shy his left leg - a reminder of the oft unseen
horrors of war. The two will reside in Washington
throughout his recovery, according to her emails
which she signs "From the Proud Army Mom".

We couild be watching his story someday much as
we did The Great Raid , an amazing movie by
Harry Weinstein which not only highlights
the drama of war but the after affects - how quickly
we forget.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Time Warp

It seems like both yesterday and a zillion years ago
that Speaker of the House Jim Wright resigned from
Congress amidst a monetary scandal. The sad part
is that whatever else he has ever done or will do in
life, that story alone will lead the obits.

What's ironic is that the scandals that have plagued
both Congress and the corporate world since then
make Wright's activities look like child's play. But,
rather than getting into all that jazz, check out Scandal, the
Culture of Mistrust in American Politics, by
Suzanne Garment.

In town for the release of his latest book The
Flying Circus : Pacific War--1943--as Seen Through
a Bombsight , the speaker was warmly received
by both former colleagues and friends. He and
his still glamorous wife Betty were relaxed and
enjoying their visit which included a personal tour of
the WWII Monument by Gen. P.X. Kelley who was on
the commission that completed the project.

According to the Speaker, the only thing he's done
wrong lately is choosing the wrong title for his book
as told to Inside the Beltway's John McCaslin at a private dinner
at Teatro Goldoni: "If I could have just changed two
words in the book's title, I could have sold a zillion
copies: Harry Potter's Flying Circus." Guests included
his former publisher Frank Margiotta, close friends
Janelle and Chuck Conconi (who recently left
Washingtonian Magazine),The Hill's Al Eisele and
CQ's Economics Editor Jodi Schneider with whom he had a lengthy
discussion regarding CAFTA vs. NAFTA. Look it up!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Cruise Control: Going Bonkers, Inc.

Trust me: This is not an advertisement for Crest
White Stripes, although Tom Cruise would be
a good catch.

It's Tom Cruise in his latest reincarnation as
therapist, doctor and mentor to those afflicted with
post partum depression, a sometimes dangerous side
effect of child birth. It seems that Cruise has been
dispensing his wisdom not only to actress Brooke
Shields, but to anyone that will listen including
Today Show host Matt Lauer.

Guess that jumping up and down on Oprah's
sofa in a declaration of love for much younger
squeeze Katy Holmes simply wasn't attention
grabbing enough for this devout Scientologist,
whatever that means. Look it up!

Well, gotta go now to check my mailbox. Word has it
that the Runaway Bride's getting married. So that's
all folks!

Photo Credits: Senator John McCain, Senator Hillary
Rodham Clinton - Linda Roth.

Janelle Conconi, Chuck Conconi, former Speaker of
the House Jim Wright - Dan E. Moldea

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Yup, that's all.

Famous Last Words

Hollywood on the Potomac
by Janet Donovan

Celebrities and politicians "spring from the same
DNA". Jack Valenti

"I'm up here just dying", said Cooper, "but I guess I'm not alone this week."

Those were the famous last words of Matt Cooper,
Master of Ceremonies at the April 1st "Fear &
Loathing at the Press Club" comedy event in honor of the late Hunter S. Thompson.

While the context was in reference to the death of
Pope John Paul II, it was eerily prophetic of things
to come some three months later when Cooper would
have to testify before a grand jury in the Valerie
Plame case.

The 29th of June was an unbearably hot sticky day
in Washington, more like one we have come to
expect in August. It would have been hot despite
the weather though when Time magazine's Matt
Cooper and New York Times reporter Judith Miller
arrived at the DC Federal Courthouse where the
media circus had been poaching for hours.

The incubation stage of the case had been in play
for so long it was difficult to remember exactly what
the fuss was all about. Craig Crawford, MSNBC's
political commentator and author of "Attack the
Messenger", paraphrased it this way: "It was a grand
jury investigation into who leaked the name of an
undercover CIA operative (Valerie Plame) that ended
with one reporter going to jail for contempt of court
(Judith Miller) and the other being released by his
anonymous source (Matt Cooper)."

The Cooper-Miller saga continues to be played out on
the stage of political partisanship; as to whether any of the other
players will be indicted is anyone's guess, but could
range from Chicago Sun Times columnist Robert Novak
to Republican political operative Karl Rove.

Betting odds: The press will be the fall guys; the made for TV rights have
already been sold; Judith Miller, incarcerated in the same Virginia prison
that houses alleged terrorist Zachariah Moussaoui, will write a best-seller
with or without her jail mate; Matt Cooper won't have to give up his day job,
although he could move on as a comic or psychic.

Famous last words: "It's fun covering Bush, "he's a man of determination and had this to say about the hurricanes: I vow to get the scums who did this." (Matt Cooper, April 1st at The Press Club) The question is: Will he?

Only winner so far is Star Limousine Service whose ominous black sedans were clustered in front of the courthouse.

Well, gotta go now, my car is waiting....so that's all folks.
Photo: Matt Cooper by Neshan H. Naltchayan

Well, gotta go now, my car is waiting....so that's all folks.
Photo: Matt Cooper by Neshan H. Naltchayan

Where's Bubba?

Hollywood on the Potomac
by Janet Donovan

Celebrities and politicians "spring from the same DNA". Jack Valenti

Where's Bubba?

When The Governor of Montana offered me his silver neckpiece at Rock the Vote's 15th Anniversary Gala at The National Building Museum, I knew I was at the right party. "This seal is on every government door knob", quipped Brian Schweitzer, the state's first Democratic Governor since 1988. However, the thought of resembling a door knob at a chi-chi party prompted me to politely decline the offer in favor of a future purchase on the state's website.

How did a Democrat get elected in a Red State? "I spoke to Bubba. He liked me." Bubba, of course, refers to the 42nd President of The United States who has been known to influence an election on sheer charisma. As for what part of Montana 42 liked best is anyone's guess but here, take a crack at it: clean air, clean water, great hunting, great fishing or liberal Marijuana laws.

"There are Republicans in Blue States and Democrats in Red States. We have to have a little fun and lighten up," continued Schweitzer on the intensity of politics so prevalent in society today.

Sounds like a plan. Too bad The Supreme Court just overturned state marijuana laws.

As for Bubba, he was a no show which didn't bother Jack Kemp who was more than happy to share temporary rock star status with Senator John McCain.

Kemp, the former American Football League All-Star turned Congressman turned Secretary of HUD turned Republican Vice Presidential candidate turned free market advocate, was in splendid form.

Referring to Rock the Vote protesters, he queried: "What's wrong with encouraging young people to vote?" He then compared the "rent-a-crowd" noisemakers to right-wing nuts. It was an odd statement coming from a man so closely aligned with The Heritage Foundation, Washington's foremost ultra conservative stronghold. Perhaps it's true that his name is being floated for a presidential bid in 2008.

Kemp and former DNC Chair Terry McAuliffe bantered about bi-partisanship at the award presentations. "I may be for Hillary and I may be for McCain." TMc "Let me as a Republican salute Obama." JK "The point is to get out the vote." TMc "Let's do something really popular and get out of here." JK

Rock the Vote is an organization that empowers young people as a political force and the evening raised around $700,000.

Overheard: "They left him alone in the Green Room and forgot he was there." Sister 2 Sister Publisher Jamie Foster Brown on the disappearing act of headliner Senator Barack Obama. Former RIAA honcho Hillary Rosen: "Jack Kemp needs to get down with The Black Eyed Peas later cause they have more in common than they know." Former Rep. Susan Molinari on her fabulous handbag sporting photos of her two children: "My husband gave it to me for Christmas," referring to her husband former New York Congressman Bill Paxon.

Seen: Rep. Mary Bono with long dark hair and bangs looking very Cheresque. Senator John McCain , surpise surprise holding court.

Photo: The Governor of Montana: Washington Life photographer Douglas Sonders


The Garden Party

Ricky Nelson would have been pleased with The Garden Party at the home of National Journal Publisher John Fox Sullivan and his talented wife Beverly held in honor of Bob Merry, Publisher of Congressional Quarterly.

Guests were relieved to know their so called "family feud" was just folklore. The two publishing rivals have actually remained good friends all these years and get a kick out of the so-called discord. So how did this rumor start?

According to Merry, The National Journal was founded by disgruntled CQ employees in 1969 and the competition began. "John and I never pass up an opportunity to gain a competitive advantage in what is a very brutal market to out maneuver the other at every turn." This night was an exception. The only maneuvering going on was getting to the bar in a hundred plus crowd including political pundit Mark Shields, Washington Post's E.J. Dionne, and author Jim Dickensen.

SANDS OF EMPIRE, Merry's just published book, is receiving kudos from both sides of the political aisle, although not lacking in high voltage controversy.

Well, gotta go now and help find Obama, so that's all folks!

Yup. That's All!

R.I.P.

Hollywood on the Potomac
by Janet Donovan

Celebrities and politicians "spring from the same DNA." Jack Valenti



At first blush, the unmasking of "Deep Throat" was like chicken soup for the soul.

W. Mark Felt's confession to Vanity Fair that he was indeed the anonymous tipster in the Watergate scandal that contributed to the demise of President Richard Nixon was both shocking and settling.

The revelation was shocking because Felt was a high level insider at the F.B.I. where loyalty and trust is everything and it was settling because it gave finality to a decades old mystery.

Or did it?

No sooner had the confession been made to V.F. when reporters began spinning another conspiracy theory: Can it be proven that he was Deep Throat? Do Woodward and Bernstein

It's like getting the last chapter in the Jimmy Hoffa mystery, but no one wants to close the book.

Pat Buchanan was furious. The former Nixon aide claims that Felt was "bitter" about the FBI because he never got the top dog leadership post at the Bureau that he so coveted. Divulging secrets was Felt's means of retaliation. "He's a snake." said Buchanan. He further claimed that Felt was probably responsible for the death of thousands of Americans posted in Vietnam since the turmoil on US soil ultimately led to the evacuation of our troops. Wow!

As for John Dean, former legal counsel to President Nixon whose testimony aided Nixon's downfall, even he had scratched Felt off the list long ago. If Dean couldn't get it right, who could? After all, Dean was Deep Throats' most avid hunter.

As for Kissinger, Halderman, Colson, Buchanan, Ziegler, Gergen and all of the other potential throats, they're just happy to get off the yellow brick road that led to Throatsville.

When Dean was asked how he felt about the unveiling of Deep Throat, he said he was waiting for an epiphany. As for me, I'm waiting for this story to go away so I can find out what The Runaway Bride REALLY did in Vegas!


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The Rita Show
Hollywood on the Hudson


The spin doctors at Fox News Channel dispatched a press release with such rapidity regarding the "imminent" departure of Rita Cosby you'd think they were in a NASCAR race bolstered by performance enhancing drugs. The massive effort to ensure her departure looked like she was relieved of her duties was ironic since they were racing to the finish line solo. A statement from the other folks came much later in the day.

While the FOX press release was factual, it's tone and wording created an onslaught of cloaked "poor Rita" condolence messages to my in-box. Having known of her switch to NBC prior to the FOX announcement, it took me by surprise. The press jumped in: "Rita Cosby, host of two weekend shows on Fox News Channel, is departing mmediately."

"Daily Variety reports that Cosby and the cable network were unable to agree on terms for a contract extension."

"Fox has made no announcements yet on a Cosby replacement or on whether the shows will continue with other hosts."

Relief for Cosby showed up around 4 PM when MSNBC released the following: "Three-time Emmy Award winner named MSNBC anchor and special correspondent."

SECAUCUS, NJ - Rita Cosby will join MSNBC, it was announced today by Rick Kaplan, President of MSNBC. Cosby will start with the network in June and will anchor a daily evening program. In addition, she will serve as a special correspondent. Cosby's program is in development and will debut in the fourth quarter."

So what does this all mean? Geraldo gets to upgrade, MSNBC goes blonde, Rita gets her own primetime show, FOX loses a good reporter and MSNBC gets one. And the winner is? Ta da.........hey, I report, you decide!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Mr. Thompson Goes to Washington

Fred Dalton Thompson, Tennessee lawyer turned actor turned Senator turned actor, was the honored guest at The Motion Picture Association of America's private screening of "LASTBESTCHANCE".

Billed as a gripping docudrama that illustrates the threat posed by vulnerable nuclear weapons and materials around the world, the film is a wake-up call to secure and destroy nuclear weapons and materials before it's too late.

While the film focused on al Qaeda, many guests were focused on John Bolton, the nominee for the coveted and sensitive United Nations post, then and currently still dangling in Congress.

The Under Secretary, Arms Control and International Security, is amidst rather contentious hearings due to his reputation for lacking diplomatic finesse, which of course is what the post is all about.

When CNN Founder Ted Turner breezed by, it was appropriate to ask him what he thought of the Bolton nomination. Turner, as you may recall, created the UN Foundation in 1998 and pledged a personal donation of a billion dollars as an "investment in the future of humanity."

Needless to say, it was somewhat shocking that he responded that he thought it was a great choice. Say what? After querying my circle of friends which included Betsy Fisher, Executive Producer of Tim Russert's Meet the Press, I decided to ask again. "I'm a bit hard of hearing," claimed Turner when asked to verify his comment. He's probably glad that his original response was not recorded as fact..... and probably equally as glad his second response is not being recorded here just in case I'm hard at hearing.

The film was a bit discombobulated going from time zone to time zone, language to language, skipping around to so many dark and secretive places you'd think we were back in Throatsville. The essence of the film was how easy it would be to unlock the secret code that would lead to the world's destruction.

In all fairness to the film, I left early when the guest in front of me cramped my legs with his chair. Not to worry though, we each received a take out copy.

Anxious to see the ending, I went to unwrap the DVD which was guarded by a chain and paddle lock and was unable to open it because I didn't have the password. I called the MPAA to find out the code. "That's easy, just dial 0000." Indeed it was, which is exactly the point.

Well, gotta go now. Don't want to miss Dr. Phil who is probably in Deep Thought analyzing Deep Throat to death by now. So that's all folks!

Yup, that's all. have notes to confirm that it was Felt? Were there other Deep Throats involved in this puzzle palace such as mini throats or junior throats?