Wednesday, June 01, 2005

R.I.P.


Hollywood on the Potomac
by Janet Donovan

Celebrities and politicians "spring from the same DNA." Jack Valenti




At first blush, the unmasking of "Deep Throat" was like chicken soup for the soul.

W. Mark Felt's confession to Vanity Fair that he was indeed the anonymous tipster in the Watergate scandal that contributed to the demise of President Richard Nixon was both shocking and settling.

The revelation was shocking because Felt was a high level insider at the F.B.I. where loyalty and trust is everything and it was settling because it gave finality to a decades old mystery.

Or did it?

No sooner had the confession been made to V.F. when reporters began spinning another conspiracy theory: Can it be proven that he was Deep Throat? Do Woodward and Bernstein

It's like getting the last chapter in the Jimmy Hoffa mystery, but no one wants to close the book.

Pat Buchanan was furious. The former Nixon aide claims that Felt was "bitter" about the FBI because he never got the top dog leadership post at the Bureau that he so coveted. Divulging secrets was Felt's means of retaliation. "He's a snake." said Buchanan. He further claimed that Felt was probably responsible for the death of thousands of Americans posted in Vietnam since the turmoil on US soil ultimately led to the evacuation of our troops. Wow!

As for John Dean, former legal counsel to President Nixon whose testimony aided Nixon's downfall, even he had scratched Felt off the list long ago. If Dean couldn't get it right, who could? After all, Dean was Deep Throats' most avid hunter.

As for Kissinger, Halderman, Colson, Buchanan, Ziegler, Gergen and all of the other potential throats, they're just happy to get off the yellow brick road that led to Throatsville.

When Dean was asked how he felt about the unveiling of Deep Throat, he said he was waiting for an epiphany. As for me, I'm waiting for this story to go away so I can find out what The Runaway Bride REALLY did in Vegas!


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The Rita Show
Hollywood on the Hudson


The spin doctors at Fox News Channel dispatched a press release with such rapidity regarding the "imminent" departure of Rita Cosby you'd think they were in a NASCAR race bolstered by performance enhancing drugs. The massive effort to ensure her departure looked like she was relieved of her duties was ironic since they were racing to the finish line solo. A statement from the other folks came much later in the day.

While the FOX press release was factual, it's tone and wording created an onslaught of cloaked "poor Rita" condolence messages to my in-box. Having known of her switch to NBC prior to the FOX announcement, it took me by surprise. The press jumped in: "Rita Cosby, host of two weekend shows on Fox News Channel, is departing mmediately."

"Daily Variety reports that Cosby and the cable network were unable to agree on terms for a contract extension."

"Fox has made no announcements yet on a Cosby replacement or on whether the shows will continue with other hosts."

Relief for Cosby showed up around 4 PM when MSNBC released the following: "Three-time Emmy Award winner named MSNBC anchor and special correspondent."

SECAUCUS, NJ - Rita Cosby will join MSNBC, it was announced today by Rick Kaplan, President of MSNBC. Cosby will start with the network in June and will anchor a daily evening program. In addition, she will serve as a special correspondent. Cosby's program is in development and will debut in the fourth quarter."

So what does this all mean? Geraldo gets to upgrade, MSNBC goes blonde, Rita gets her own primetime show, FOX loses a good reporter and MSNBC gets one. And the winner is? Ta da.........hey, I report, you decide!

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Mr. Thompson Goes to Washington

Fred Dalton Thompson, Tennessee lawyer turned actor turned Senator turned actor, was the honored guest at The Motion Picture Association of America's private screening of "LASTBESTCHANCE".

Billed as a gripping docudrama that illustrates the threat posed by vulnerable nuclear weapons and materials around the world, the film is a wake-up call to secure and destroy nuclear weapons and materials before it's too late.

While the film focused on al Qaeda, many guests were focused on John Bolton, the nominee for the coveted and sensitive United Nations post, then and currently still dangling in Congress.

The Under Secretary, Arms Control and International Security, is amidst rather contentious hearings due to his reputation for lacking diplomatic finesse, which of course is what the post is all about.

When CNN Founder Ted Turner breezed by, it was appropriate to ask him what he thought of the Bolton nomination. Turner, as you may recall, created the UN Foundation in 1998 and pledged a personal donation of a billion dollars as an "investment in the future of humanity."

Needless to say, it was somewhat shocking that he responded that he thought it was a great choice. Say what? After querying my circle of friends which included Betsy Fisher, Executive Producer of Tim Russert's Meet the Press, I decided to ask again. "I'm a bit hard of hearing," claimed Turner when asked to verify his comment. He's probably glad that his original response was not recorded as fact..... and probably equally as glad his second response is not being recorded here just in case I'm hard at hearing.

The film was a bit discombobulated going from time zone to time zone, language to language, skipping around to so many dark and secretive places you'd think we were back in Throatsville. The essence of the film was how easy it would be to unlock the secret code that would lead to the world's destruction.

In all fairness to the film, I left early when the guest in front of me cramped my legs with his chair. Not to worry though, we each received a take out copy.

Anxious to see the ending, I went to unwrap the DVD which was guarded by a chain and paddle lock and was unable to open it because I didn't have the password. I called the MPAA to find out the code. "That's easy, just dial 0000." Indeed it was, which is exactly the point.

Well, gotta go now. Don't want to miss Dr. Phil who is probably in Deep Thought analyzing Deep Throat to death by now. So that's all folks!

Yup, that's all.
have notes to confirm that it was Felt? Were there other Deep Throats involved in this puzzle palace such as mini throats or junior throats?